Friday, May 10, 2024
In 1963, The Mighty Sparrow, the greatest calypsonian ever, scored one of his biggest hits with the above song. It is a story about masculinity, machismo and the power men have over women, even if maybe misogynistic. That song is over 60 years old, but it still resonates throughout the Caribbean and Latin countries, and in Belize, because of its bravura, its boastfulness and its confirmation of male superiority! American and European men’s enthusiasm for those aspirations have been severely tempered by their women, who have graduated from serfdom to equality, for the most part. This is mostly apparent amongst white men; men of color in America and Europe still try to exert that power over women, but it’s a losing battle.
In Belize, and this is my opinion only, a majority of men think that they are still in charge, that they own their significant other, that they can make decisions for them! I know of cases where, after giving birth, women sometimes want to tie their tubes for whatever reason. The doctor, who is totally out of line, consults the spouse; and if he doesn’t agree, well, then the woman remains a breeding factory. The same with the antiquated divorce and ownership laws in the Jewel; they are more favorable to men than they are to women. How disgraceful and disgusting is that?
Politicians, journalists and men in general in Belize, believe that they know best when it comes to the affairs of women. Thirty years ago I believed the same thing; I was macho, and thought that I should be waited on, that my clothes should be washed and ironed by the spouse, and that when I got home food better be on the table! How inconsiderate we were, and still are, expecting so much while contributing so little to relationships, most of the time! I have since grown up and learned that life and love and marriage are a give and take, not just gimmes! Of course, I learned that too late, but better late than nevah, no true?
Women today are on an equal plain with men in all areas, except for physical strength. They’re more educated than men are; invariably they are the main breadwinners; and yet, after a hard day’s work they have to come home, take care of kids, make supper and clean up after that. Superwoman! And WTF?
In this day and age, this way of life should not be acceptable. If your wife or your woman says no, it’s no! You don’t have the right to push against her will. You don’t own her; she’s not your pet nor your inferior; she, or in rare cases, he, is your equal! That, “my way or the highway” is so stupid, and indicates immaturity and insecurity in you, Mr. Macho Man. That king of the castle, the El Rey bullshit, is antediluvian and should stop! That’s why they cheat on you, and you feel injured? Again, WTF, what do you expect?
Start giving your spouse, and women in general, the respect they deserve! Stop taking advantage of vulnerable women, which is so easy to do. If you are a man, and not some sniveling, arrogant, narcissistic scum, you should be able to adore, cherish, and most importantly, respect your partner! Be a man!
In my younger days, I used to love and agree with Sparrow and that song. Today, it is more Otis Redding, and “Try a little tenderness”.
“And if a woman ever say that I, ever left her dissatisfied, she lie, she lie, she lie!” —
The Mighty Sparrow: The Village Ram.
Glen