“A dream is a wish your heart makes, when you’re fast asleep. In dreams you will lose your heartaches. Whatever you wish for, you keep. Have faith in your dreams and someday your rainbow will come smiling through. No matter how your heart is grieving. If you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true.” (Cinderella (Disney)–”A dream is a wish your heart makes”.)
And I would sing and twirl around the flowers, smiling with joy, until… Until I heard her. A girl taller than me and approximately 12 years of age, long black hair, faceless, with a long white dress.
“Ariadna….,” she called out. Soft, beautiful, luring voice. Musical to my ears. She hid behind the lime tree not far away from me but not too close. I was glued to the spot. Not of fear, but of wonder. I remember wondering if she was my mom, but that thought was wiped from my mind because she was too young to be my mom. I couldn’t see her features clearly, but if I am not mistaken, I believe I saw her smile at me and I smiled back. I wasn’t afraid of her. To the contrary, I felt joy, I felt wonder. I didn’t feel alone.
After a minute of us smiling at each other, she faded away. Even after her being gone, I kept smiling and continued singing with more passion. I never saw her again, but she gave me hope. That was my first encounter with a spirit and I wasn’t even afraid. When exhaustion finally came, I went to my dad’s room to tell him about my experience.
He smiled and told me that she was another dead one, another soul that was being mourned for. He told me that if another one appears to never follow it, for I can get lost. I was even more amazed after my father told me a little about what he knew of them based on his experiences. I remember I would go to the garden often, dressed as a princess, and sang for her, wanting to see her again, to ask her name, to see her face, but she never appeared again.
However, I felt her presence. I felt her energy and that was enough for me to believe and to hope that through her I could have a connection with my mother. Years passed. I never got to see my mother the way I saw her, but other girls would appear to me and I took that as a gesture that my mother sent them as a sign to tell me that she was there with me, that she was watching over me, taking care of me.
I got to accept the fact that I wouldn’t see my mother again while I was on earth; however, I made “invisible” friends; invisible to others but not to me. I would play, sing and dance with them. My father would sometimes hear me talking to myself, but he wouldn’t question it, for he knew that I was talking to my spirit friends. Of course, they didn’t talk to me the way humans communicate, but their energy was answer enough.
I am 18 years old, and I still talk to myself, to them. When the day is over and the sun is setting, I would go to the mobile home, where my mother, father and I lived when my mom was still alive, and I would talk to them. My father would always be wondering what I was doing there.
The truth is, I would continue to interact with them in hopes that someday I will see my mother again.